Copyright Pledge Drive Celsius Blog Newsletter Links

Volume 6

Paris Hilton's Address Book
Precipitates Identity Crisis
February 22, 2005

Talking Driver's License Fixes
Traffic Tickets
February 23, 2005

White House Fires Bush's Longtime
Nickname Aide
February 25, 2005

Helpful Hints about Preparing
Your House for Sale
February 26, 2005

Get Ready for Horoscopes
on Network Television News
February 28, 2005

FCC Censors Ponder
a French Kiss
March 1, 2005

Now, Martha Faces
Recidivism Danger
March 2, 2005

Britney's Marriage, Paris' Address
Book not What You Think
March 3, 2005

Do Pilots Wear Diapers or
Lick Toes for Money?
March 4, 2005

Jackson Trial not
Entertainment News
March 7, 2005

SAT Secret Is
Practis, Practis, Practis
March 8, 2005

Alien Crop Circles in Pennsylvania
Linked to Presidential Election
March 9, 2005

Woman Plagued by Husband Who
Hoards Used Motor Oil
March 10, 2005

Innovative Furniture Eases Burden on
Congressmen Living in Their Offices
March 11, 2005

"Does Iowa Smell Bad?" Ad Campaign
Becomes a Bovine Stinker
March 14, 2005

Many Hope Disney Will Now Drop
Pants for Pooh Plans
March 16, 2005

Effluent Spill, Bulldozer Duel Latest
Septic System News
March 18, 2005

Senator Frist's Neurological
Diagnosis Heartens Entrepreneur
March 21, 2005

Fake News Satirists Flummoxed
by the Real Thing
March 23, 2005

Secret Service Worries about Bush
Fondness for Bald Heads
March 25, 2005

Bush Presses on with Fake Video
News Reports
March 28, 2005

Appliance that Washes Dishes and
People Together Recalled
March 30, 2005

Checking Bumper Stickers in Bush's
Parking Lot
March 31, 2005

Blue Ribbon Panel to Assess Iraq's
Appetite for Baseball
April 2, 2005

At This High School -- Out, Out
Damned Stress
April 4, 2005

CDC Cafeteria Revamps Menu
to Help in Obesity Fight
April 6, 2005

Tom DeLay Weighing Name Change
to Cleanse Reputation
April 7, 2005

Parsing Want Ad Ennui: How Granny Lost Her Rocking Chair
December 9, 2004

Hardee's Monster Thickburger Assaults Devoted Vegan
December 10, 2004

Loyalist-Packed Bush Cabinet to
Have a Designated Dissenter
December 13, 2004

Explosion of Giant Chocolate Chip
Cookie Propels Town on Eating Orgy
December 14, 2004

Was that Bernie Kerik Fighting Flea
Market Counterfeits?
December 15, 2004

Finally, a Toll-Free Help Center
Actually Helps Someone
December 16, 2004

Bush Releases List of Medal of
Freedom Runners-Up
December 17, 2004

Algebra Rant Activates
Swat Team Assault
December 20, 2004

Casino Surveillance Cameras
Catch Nose Picking Fest
December 21, 2004

Toothless Old Men Whinny Like
Horses after Eating Soup
December 22, 2004

Iowa Man Says Web Surfing Might
Have Caused Eyestrain
December 23, 2004

Ashcroft Battens Down Hatches
for Christmas in the Great Hall
December 24, 2004

Deciphering the Latest
Rumsfeldian Tea Leaves
December 27, 2004

Down in Crawford.
Dubya Feels the Soomi Pain
December 29, 2004

NFL to Charge for Family
Super Bowl Parties
December 31, 2004

In Payback of the Faithful Republican,
Families Destroy Secret Papers
January 3, 2005

Talk Radio Gets Ready for Annual
Shout Down and National Scream
January 4, 2005

Satirium's Winter Reading List
January 5, 2005

Macho Man Searches for the
Inner Self thrugh Knitting
January 6, 2005

Lost Picasso Painting of a Dachshund
on a Stair Found in Paris Storeroom
January 7, 2005

Want Better Television? Sue the
Pants off the Networks
January 10, 2005

Woman Who Paid $50,000 for a
Cloned Cat Demands Her Money Back
January 11, 2005

White House Has New Screening Test
for Potential Bush Two Hires
January 12, 2005

Please Sir, Just a Few Questions
about Iraq and WMD?
January 13, 2005

In Meals Protest, Delta Pilots Eat
Garbage during Flight
January 14, 2005

Under Pressure, NBC Agrees to Add
Sheep to Its Programming
January 17, 2005

Ancient Dairy Farmer Ponders Bare
Breasts and Swimsuit Super Models
January 18, 2005

Neocon Hardliners Push Plan to Clone
Rumsfeld, Cheney, and Rice
January 19, 2005

Bush Family Ponders Dynastic Future
at yet Another Inauguration
January 20, 2005

Republican Congressman Trapped in
Office Bed Misses Inauguration
January 21, 2005

Panel of Lexicographers Deadlocked
on Bush Convincing Mandate Claim
January 24, 2005

Soap Opera Shocker: Talking Crows
to Join General Hospital Cast
January 25, 2005

Texas Town Gets Serious about Fat
Kids with Salad Meditation, Algebra
January 26, 2005.

Satirium Confesses to Being Paid
by Political Operatives
January 27, 2005

.Ask the Betsy: Expert Advice about
Life's Little Problems
January 28, 2005

Time to Stop the Veiled References
to Sex on Soap Operas
January 31, 2005

Robot Goes on Rampage after Dog
Won't Get off the Couch
February 1, 2005

Mouthwash Etc Is New York's Latest
Glitterati Watering Hole
February 2, 2005

Kangaroo Claps too Much at State
of the Union Address
February 3, 2005

TV Dismay: Viewers Prefer Watching
Commercials More than Programs
February 4, 2005

Bush Makes a Big Bet on Global
Warming at the Crawford, Texas Ranch
February 7, 2005

Tough Questions on Social Security
at Bush Town Hall Meetings
February 8, 2005

Library Patron's Computer Arm
Chip Takes no Prisoners
February 9, 2005

Plumbers Fear Law Might Penalize
Their Buttocks Cleavage
February 10, 2005

Bush, in Rare Monologue, Explains
Where Program Money Will Come from
February 11, 2005

Brit Royals Inspire New
Wal-Mart Furniture
February 14, 2005

Parsing Employee Democratic
Politics at Google
February 15, 2005

Student Advises Bush
on Global Warming
February 16, 2005

Fan Stunned by
NBA Four Beer Rule
February 17, 2005

Bureau of Prisons Unveils Martha
Countdown Clock
February 18, 2005

Jeff Gannon (aka James Guckert) Is
Just the Tip of the Iceberg
February 21, 2005