November 5, 2004, 2004

Internet Satirists, Humorists Ecstatic over Bush Win

Fake Journalists Prefer the Vice and Folly They Already Know

A post-election poll of Internet satirists and fake journalists has found that a large majority are ecstatic over President Bush's re-election. They believe he offers many more opportunities for ridicule, parody, and the celebration of folly than John Kerry, the Democratic candidate.

"The first Bush Administration provided a bonanza of opportunities for satirists and fake journalists to ply their trade, particularly during the last two years when they controlled Congress and got us into a war," said Blinkie Winterbun, executive director of the National Association of Internet Fake Journalists.

"Certainly John Kerry and Teresa would have provided opportunities for ridicule and satire, but the Bushies have a proven track record. Kerry would have had to search far and wide to come up with a Rumsfeld or an Ashcroft. How many times can you make fun of Edwards and his smile before it gets tiresome?"

The NAIFJ poll involved a random sample of 600 of the 3.6 million association members, all of whom run one or more Web sites that use fake news to satirize, ridicule, and amuse.

"Let me remind you that the dictionary says satire involves exposing and discrediting vice and folly," said Armando Ditherton, whose Web site Dead Pet Walking lampoons veterinarians and pet owners. "Where can you find a better daily diet of vice and folly than four more years of searches for weapons of mass destruction, John Ashcroft peering under the nation's beds for hidden terrorists, the eternal search for Osama, and Rumsfeld trying to solve the unknown unknowns conundrum?"

A total of 77 percent of those surveyed said they were either "happy," "very happy," or "deliriously happy" that Bush had won another term and would thus provide a steady supply of fresh material for their Web sites.

Of the 23 percent who said they were unhappy Bush had won the election, a majority cited the fact that they would have to shelve plans to build new Web sites that were to be devoted to one aspect or another of a Kerry presidency.

"It's a bummer. I was all ready to roll our new site out, but now we're on hold," said Jacob Fritzie, who had developed an elaborate Web site named Ketchup Chocolate Chip Cookie that would focus on First Lady Teresa Heinz Kerry.

Also on hold is a new Web site named Flipityflopity.

"We knew we would have be sitting pretty if Kerry won," said Ronald Donaldson, who conceived the site's concept. "Kerry's still in the Senate, but flip-flops in the Senate? Show me some humor in that. Show me anything funny in the Senate."

Copyright 2003-2004 William Stockton & Smithtown Creek Productions
All Rights Reserved
satire | humor | comedy | parody| satirical headlines