Wonderful Things Happen When Creative Minds Are Unleashed
Bill: We need to do something on these kangaroo courts at Guantanamo and how detainees say they did terrorism things but it’s so obvious they were tortured.
Farley: They have kangaroos at Guantanamo?
Zelda: How can you be funny about Guantanamo… torture and all that?
Bill: O.K., then let’s look for some biting satire.
Farley: You could do a Wiley Coyote and Roadrunner bit with Cheney as the coyote.
Lucy: That’s cute, but flip it. Cheney is the roadrunner and this Osama-looking guy is the coyote.
Zelda: The roadrunner is too much of a cliche.
Lucy: So, do Bugs Bunny. Cheney is Elmer Fudd.
Farley: Bugs Bunny as a terrorist? How is that funny?
Lucy: I know! Bush is Bugs Bunny. Then you throw in this Yosemite Sam character as the terrorist.
Bill: That’s enough. No Looney Tunes. Give it a rest.
Zelda: What about a road trip? Little Miss Sunshine meets Grapes of Wrath?
Bill: Now we’re cooking. The detainees form a volley ball team and then go on a tour in a bus around the country playing exhibition games.
Farley: And their opponents are always beautiful beach babes who wear tiny in-your-face bikinis that have sort of a military look.
Lucy: Cheney is this jolly, wacko bus driver.
Zelda: I’ve got it! Bush is the team’s coach. You’d have these great scenes in which Bush gives these inspirational speeches at half-time, except he’s sort of weird and zoned out in a funny way.
Lucy: You make him like the Sean Penn character in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
Bill: That’s funny. But where’s the satire?
Farley: The whole country falls in the love with the team and its Cinderella story, sort of rags to riches with some Phantom of the Opera thrown in.
Bill: But you need an ending, something satirical but uplifting at the same time.
Zelda: The public eats up their story and there is this great grassroots thing that just rises up and demands that the terrorist volleyball team members get real trials in real courts with real evidence.
Lucy: That could be a really, really feel good ending. And satirical.
Bill: I think I’ll go out to the patio and lie around in the sun with a beer.
Farley: I’m for that!
Zelda: Don’t you need a love story somewhere in this? And could I ask, by the way, who’s going to write this? You guys always come up with these crazy things and then you disappear and expect me to do all the heavy lifting.