Plan Now to Enter Constitution Amendment Fair

Entry Deadline Is March 31; Officials Expect Record Entries

The annual United States of America Constitution Amendment Fair will be held April 9-10 on the Washington Mall between the Washington Monument and the Lincoln Memorial. The 10 best amendments selected by the judges will be introduced before Congress for consideration. Entry deadline is 5 p.m. March 31, 2004.

Here's a rundown of some of the early entries:

Agricultural Global Warming Amendment
Sponsor: Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, Democrat of Massachusetts
Prohibits all agricultural animals from emitting methane. An agricultural animal is defined as any non-human species that weighs more than one pound and is kept with the intention of making a profit, whether or not such profit is actually realized.

All Terrain VehiclesProliferation Amendment
Sponsor: All Terrain Vehicles Association
Prohibits Congress, the President or any Federal or state court from interfering with the right of owners of All Terrain Vehicles of any type, past, present or future, to ride their ATVs wherever they want on public or private lands. Also specifically permits children over the age of two years to operate ATVs and prohibits any requirements for roll bars, helmets or other devices intended to protect operators of ATVs from physical injury.

Presidential Wealth Amendment
Sponsor: Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation
Requires that any candidate for President must have a certified net worth of at least $10 million before said candidate can be certified to stand for election in any state primary presidential election or caucus or any national presidential election.

Diet Coke Education Amendment
Sponsor: Coca Cola Company and Georgia Congressional Delegation
Prohibits sale or serving of any and all beverages, carbonated or otherwise, in public schools except Diet Coke; mandates that all children K-12 in public schools be served two 16-ounce servings of Diet Coke each day school is in session.

Excessive Cooking of Broccoli Amendment
Sponsor being sought
All citizens, regardless of sex, race, creed or percent of adipose tissue, are guaranteed the right to cook broccoli in any manner they wish and as long as they wish; provides exemption for restaurants in Manhattan, San Francisco and the South Beach area of Miami that seat more than 20 people.

Presidential Dynasty Amendment
Sponsor: Americans for Freedom
Prohibits any and all lineal descendants of Joseph Kennedy Sr. and their current or former spouses from holding any elected public office once any such lineal descendants now holding elected public office have completed their terms.

Sunday Newspaper Amendment
Sponsor: The New York Times Company and Tribune Media
Neither Congress, the President or the Judiciary may make any law or otherwise seek to limit the weight of any newspaper with a publication date that is a Sunday.

Reagan Amendment
Sponsor being sought
Adds the signature of former President Ronald Reagan to the Declaration of Independence and renames it the Ronald Reagan Declaration of Independence.

Ventura Amendment
Sponsor: Actor and Director Woody Allen
Prohibits professional wrestlers, boxers, race horse jockeys, NASCAR drivers, National Football League players and weight lifters who can bench press more than 300 pounds from ever holding the office of president.

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