Memory Loss Is a Normal Part of Aging, So Learn to Live with It
Problem: Can’t find your glasses.
Solution: Get your glasses their own personal cell phone and attach the phone to the glasses. Any time you can’t find your glasses, call the cell phone using your land line and listen for the glasses to ring.
Problem: Can’t remember where the land line telephone is located.
Solution: Install a flashing red strobe light on the wall above the location of the land line telephone. Hang a large sign under the strobe light with an arrow pointing downward to the phone and big letters that say: “Here’s the telephone, Stupid!”
Problem: Can’t remember your wife’s name.
Solution: Go to a tattoo parlor and get a small tattoo on the underside of your wrist that has a heart and your wife’s name.
Problem: Can’t remember the glasses’ cell phone number.
Solution: Go back to the tattoo parlor and have the artist put the cell phone number just below your wife’s name. Don’t forget to include the area code in case you have to call your glasses while on a trip out of town.
Problem: Can’t remember your daughter’s name and the name of her odious husband.
Solution: Call the glasses’ cell phone and leave a permanent voice mail message that reminds you of the names. Can’t remember the cell phone number? It’s in the tattoo.
Problem: Can’t remember where the tattoo is.
Solution: Oh, come on! Get a grip. Surely you can remember at least one thing?